subtract. subtract. subtract.

I don't know to do.
add some. subtract of me.
I can't sleep.

"You have enemies? Good.
That means you've stood up for something,
sometime in your life."
(Winston Churchill)



backburner. backburner. backburner.

Listen to: Anything by Coldplay. The only thing that makes me sleep around 5 in the morning these days.

Mass.

Why do I feel like I can't say what's on my mind anymore? I feel like something big has to happen for me to finally speak up because other things have been clouding my judgment. Why do I feel permanently muffled. I haven't really told anyone about why or when I started feeling like this because I don't know the real cause, but I know that my thoughts are just swimming and I've got no where to put them. I wouldn't know what any of my friends would say if I said what's really going on my mind, but it will come out eventually.

I went to Cambridge, Mass to visit my friend from High School and I've never ever felt so carefree in my entire life. I didn't have one care in the world besides have fun and spend time with my friend. I feel in love with New England in three days and I want to go back now. I want to leave everything and never come back but that will never happen so I stick with what I got.

The only thing that did come up in these three days, that comes up all the time for me is, why don't I have a love life? See. I'm not expecting the dream girl in the first try. I gave up on that hope at this point, but just someone. Someone to share myself with. Someone to vomit inducing to other people because we are cute together. Why can't I have that?

I was on the train to Mass. on Wednesday and I watched the movie, titled 'Once', for the second time and it really hit me. The song, Falling Slowly, from the movie really touched me at the end of the movie and I was crying on the train. Literally crying. Movies don't make me cry and if you know me, I've seen A LOT of movies and only one other movie has made me cry. The ending of Pleasantville made me tear up for some odd reason, but I was bawling on the train and the person next to me asked if I was okay and I just nodded and continued watching the end of the movie. 

The movie showed me something I wanted. That connection with another person. This post is becoming a real drag, but it's what I am feeling at this point. I feel like I'm in High School again. Admiring a girl at a distance and not saying a word because I know it would NEVER happen. The story of my life.

Oh, Happy Easter, btw. I had a pleasant Easter, to a degree. I saw my Grandpa from Haiti and that's pretty cool. Other things, not so much.

Listen to: Falling Slowly by Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova

style.

three posts in one morning? crazy shit!

I want to develop my own writing style. I don't know how I would do that, but I want to be able to write something that is realistic. Something that shows that the characters would actually say the things I wrote if they were real. I hate when people try to embellish and push the point, "oh, I can write so I'm going to use every literary device I know and confuse my reader with some non colloquial speech." Not cool at all. I like realistic speech in my characters and embellish in description, but only when needed. I hope I achieve while I am in college and continue to grow and change.

Listen to: Anything by Cut Copy
p.s. comment my blog. that would be cool.

recomm.

ksflvkjfldkfs. I'm happy that Vampire Weekend is getting all this praise. I CALLED IT! lol

Band(s) of the Week:
Ra Ra Riot - Playing SXSW this year, check out this smoothing, easy listening band at their myspace; http://www.myspace.com/rarariot

Netherfriends - Hailing from Chicago, this cool kids show how to master pop and make it their own. myspace them, bitches; http://www.myspace.com/netherfriends. send book info to: netherfriendsbooking@gmail.com

Dirty Projectors - If you haven't listened to them yet, get on it because you are missing one of the most unique musical groups out there! myspace it; http://www.myspace.com/dirtyprojectors and go here: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=13969414&sc=nl&cc=sod-20070827

Video of the Week:
Love No by the Teenagers. Weird Video and song, but I love it!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F9OoWdarxmo

Book of the Week:
Oil! by Upton Sinclair - Everyone should read it. I am almost done and loving every moment of it. Highly Recommend! Upton never dissappoints.

Post Secret of the Week:















Listen to: Anything by the Junior Boys. Have fun!

blame canada

I like meeting new people. I think it is the best part of my college experience. I get to meet people who are way cooler, smarter, funnier, attractive, kinder than me. I think it helps me grow as a person. I like the instant when you know the person you are talking you right now can become one of you friends and you can trust them with who you are. It is such a great feeling.

My concept for a play I might write.
It is something I've had in my mind all of HS.
It might be a bad idea. It probably is but I'm going
to say it anyway:

Write a play that incorporates the title of the play
which is a touchy subject into a mundane activity or event.
EXAMPLE - Title of the play is Rape. The story is about the French and Indian War.
or Title of the play is Abortion. The story about being a Baseball Star in a small town in Penn.

Lame, but I needed to say it. It has probably been done before,
but I wanna go for it. Wish me luck. I am going to start tomorrow.

Listen to: Writer's Block by Peter Bjorn & John

Freak Out

I had an amazing night last night. A new night with a new me. 

I like it. I hope this good mood stays forever. I need it! 

I wish people would stop making a big deal about their lives. I'm sorry you didn't think the party was cool. Boohoo. Go somewhere else and blow steam in your room. Alone. Drown in your own self contained ego party.

Also, you aren't right all the time. You justify your actions for the sheer reason that whatever you say or do is golden. You couldn't possibly made a mistake. You couldn't possibly be doing things that you look down upon people for. That would be hypocritical. You would NEVER do that because you are perfect, right? You aren't changing into a carbon copy of your own society. That would just something trivial to say. You are perfect after all. 

This diatribe did have a lot of meaning behind it because I could name 4... no. 20 people I know like this. Lighten up a little and maturity is not measured by the amount of books you claim to read or all the alcohol you just consumed or the amount of opinions you claim to have. So get a life that doesn't make your friends just pawns in your little game and stop making it all about you.

Listen to: Freak Out by Liars

oh yea!

Hilary won Texas, Ohio, and RI.

She is doing it out of spite now.

With all this in fighting, McCain will be president.

I love you, Clinton, but fucking let Obama win this thing

so we can have a chance to win this election.

You don't HAVE to be the president. 

Vice President/Secretary of something is cool, too.

My thoughts on the election. Thank you. lol.

New

I am new person.

I have to be.

I want to be.

Watch out!

p.s. Go see In Bruges. Fantastic Movie.

Listen to: Atlas by Battles

Without

I know what I want. I want some of my friends to care more. Just a little more than they are already. I don't want a fucking parade or festival or shower of gifts. I want people to care. I want people to understand fully that I would do anything for a friend. My friends will be the end of me. I've never felt so utterly awful and useless. I want to get away from it all.

Listen to: We Used To Be Friends by The Dandy Warhols